Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Am I weird?

I know I'm not a typical Parisian, but do I stand out like a sore thumb? I'm sitting in the park by our place, in one of Paris' "Paris WiFi" (pronounced "pa-ree wee-fee") spots, as advertised on the front of the park's gate, while mothers play with their kids on the playground, old folks take a rest, guys play ping-pong and pigeons search for some grub. Normally, just sitting in the park wouldn't merit blatant stares of curiosity, but I've got this big, dinosaur-like laptop with me that I'm typing away on while sitting on this park bench. They're probably wondering what I'm doing in a park, outside, on my laptop. Those things just don't go together, I suspect, in their eyes. I wish I could ask them if I look strange, but I don't think I need to. I'm totally an outcast.

It could just be me, being paranoid like usual, but I'm not so sure this time. Even when I'm just walking to the grocery store to do some shopping or sitting on the metro alone, I feel like an outcast. It's like maybe they know I'm different, that I can't really hold a conversation with them the way I'd like to. Or, maybe it's not appropriate to give a small smile when I pass someone on the street or not turn my head when some dude yells, excusez-moi, mademoiselle in what sounds like a catcalling voice. I know I know I'm weird, but do they know, too? Back home I can get away with being weird and not letting anyone know...here, I think it'll take time for me to figure out a way to mask my weirdness. For now, I'll just carry on as the paranoid non-Parisian and go about my business looking for a place to fit in.

Oh, and I'm totally coming back to the park while we wait for our internet to activate - as long as the weather's this good it's hard to avoid such an opportunity anyway.


View from the park bench.

4 comments:

JV said...

Hey! Your from Austin...Keep Austin Weird...Keep Austinites Weirder!! :) You couldn't be a true Austinite if you weren't weird...so.....weird on!!

Candy said...

your mom is WEIRD!!! and so's that comment!

Evolutionary Revolutionary said...

I like to think you are just being hyper self aware due to your new move, but I'm sure being an american in Paris is painfully obvious. I won't lie that I'm pretty worried about that! But just be yourself and F everyone else! Soon you will make a few friends in your hood (or import some, hint hint!) and the stares won't feel so obvious.

Also, tell youself that they are just mezmerized by your exotic beauty. That will help too. :)

Chin up! When do you come back state side again? The grill is getting warmed up already!

guillaume said...

you ain't bizarre!!! you're my wife(i) ahah