Deux

Two months.  Eight weeks and 4 days, to be exact. Those first few, worry-filled weeks are finally starting to fade from my memory and the days seem to be moving right along at lightning speed. Avienne is growing longer, stronger and much more aware. She's gone from observing her hands and fingers to realizing that she can touch things right in front of her. Among her favorite things to grab are the wooden toys on her bouncer and the nose of whoever dares to get close enough.  And she talks. Quite a lot. Although she seems to be camera shy, so every time we try to catch her on film, she freezes up.  (I did manage to sneak in a recording the other day, but Blogger is acting up and won't let me add it here.  I'll post it once I can figure it out.)

She's blowing through her clothes, too. She's fitting comfortably in 3 month outfits, although she's already fitting into lots of 6 month French clothes (I guess French babies are smaller?).  Sadly, she's already outgrown a few handknits I made for her, too. Her main issue with sizing is length; the girl's got legs and some of her 3 month footies are simply too short for her to stretch her legs out completely. Other, non-footed sleepers are high-watered on her, which actually looks really funny.

She's still eating well, but we haven't yet gotten her to sleep for much more than 4 hours through the night - even though she refuses to take long naps during the day.  Her sleep schedule is still a work in progress but over the past two nights she's been sleeping for 5-hour stretches, so I see longer nights of sleep on the horizon.

I'm also happy to report that she's looking more like me everyday. Even with her balding head, grey-blue eyes and pink skin, she's starting to morph into a mini-me and it makes me smile. I think Gui's a little upset that she's no longer his spitting image, but I have a feeling she'll go back to looking more like her papa in no time, so I think he'll get over it.

On being a new mama

It's hit me on a few occasions that my life as I once knew it has morphed into something a bit more complicated and far more important. I love my baby girl more than I can express in words, but I have to say that for me, becoming a mother has been hard work. I don't know how other mamas make it seem so easy! Besides the fact that I can't jump out of bed in the morning and head out for coffee or brunch without first thinking about getting my little girl ready and deciding on which nursing-friendly top I'll have to wear in case she gets hungry, I've also got a whole little human being to look after and raise to become a responsible grown-up.  

I find myself over-analyzing every action I take that could possibly affect how she'll behave or see the world later on.  Parents have some hard decisions to make about their children's health, education and overall upbringing and there seem to be pressures from every which way to conform one way or another.

Being a new mama has definitely made me look back at my own upbringing and feel so grateful for my parents and all the decisions they faced and made for me.  I'm just hoping that whatever choices we decide for our girl will be ones that she doesn't even realize we had to make.